My Journey over the years has been bittersweet. Nonetheless, I would not have it any other way. My walk with God began 25 years ago in Jamaica. I was baptized at Portmore United Church and quickly became involved in various activities such as the choir, drama group, and youth fellowship.
While I enjoyed being involved in my local church and doing good things, I did not realize that I was living the life of a Moralist and not a person who has a personal relationship with God. All that I did at that time had no eternal value: it was all for my glory and not God. God was not being glorified in my life during that period because I was not even trying to carry out the great commission.
After migrating to the United States, I drifted away from God. I strayed so far that it was easy for me to convince myself that as long as I am honest, give freely, love others, and be a good citizen God would still bless me and be my shield. So I would go to Church occasionally, but I was not serious about my walk with God.
I had no prayer life. I would do quick two-minute prayers daily, but I had no connection with God. There was always a void. Eventually, I realized that I was built with a God-shaped vacuum, and I would never succeed until I allowed God to live in there. Because I can’t truly live the life of a Christian on my own, in my own strength. This Flesh would always fail me: It does not want to be under God’s authority because it only wants to me to yield to its own wishes and desires.
I had to make the decision to clear my God-shaped vacuum of everything that does not belong and to be intentional about serving God.
The past 7-8 years have seen a transformation in me. I finally decided to walk with Jesus, no turning back. I decided to trust Him with everything in me and to be obedient to His will. And I discovered that He was always there waiting with outstretched arms waiting for me to come home.
As I grew spiritually I realized that I was created to worship God. Everything else is secondary and can wait. Life was never about me at all, it’s all about God. When I accepted that it’s not about me, I started to experience a true and genuine relationship with God. My life then became a life of prayer and worship.
As I began to agree with God’s precious promises for my life, I developed this zeal and zest to always want to be in His presence. When I had my encounter with God all I wanted to do is to love Him above all human relationships, and to do my best to make my life reflect Him in everything I do.
I have developed a prayer life over the years I started to speak to God with His own words. I tell God that He said that He will never leave me nor forsake me.
“Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, He it is that doth go with thee; He will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.” ~ Deuteronomy 31:6
I tell Him that He said He knows the plans He has for me.
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” ~ Jeremiah 29:11
I just tell God whatever He puts in my thoughts when I pray, and that I am standing on His Word.
Over time, I started to believe that I have in me the same power that raised Jesus from the dead, so I refused to walk around a defeated Christian. Because I know the battle is already won. I tell myself that signs, miracles, and wonders follow Lisa Rodney. God did not give me a new name for riches and wealth but to declare that He is Lord.
When I started to walk in the power and authority that God gave me, I experienced tremendous blessing and miracles in my situation regarding the things that I had prayed for. Recently, I was facing what seems like an impossible issue, and there is no way around it except a miracle. I fasted and prayed about it and I trusted God with all I had in me. Favor was granted because I serve a God of the impossible. As God’s Word tells us
“For with God nothing shall be impossible.” ~ Luke 1:37
I also know that God orchestrates every event in my life and He is supreme over everything. So, if He does not give me what I ask for, I know that a delay is not always a no. He is still God, He is still victorious, He still sits on the throne, and He has something greater for me. When God does not give me what I ask for, I ask Him, if it’s not His will, to help me to understand.
As I grew in my relationship with God, I had the desire to tell everyone about my hope and to defend my faith, but I needed more of the Word in me to evangelize and declare boldly the name of Jesus. As a result, I attended Ebenezer Bible School and completed a three-year course in Christian studies to help equip me for ministry.
May I confess that reading the Bible is SWEET? I get excited when I read the stories and get an epiphany, which I then discuss with my brothers and sister in Christ.
I am still shy and reserved, but I try to obey God’s Word even when I am fearful of what could go wrong, because I know He did not give me a spirit of fear but of sound mind. I know the devil is a liar, so if he tells me I can’t do it I know I can because he always lies. Now when I am asked to do something, I step out in faith and rely on God’s strength, despite all my “what ifs”.
I have become active in my local church again, but this time around I serve gladly. I gladly show up for church and Bible study on time. I gladly teach Sunday school and serve on the finance team and the ladies ministry board. Not seeking earthly approval, but knowing that my reward is in heaven and that what I do for Christ has to have eternal value.
At times when I see the hand of God in my life, I would smile and say “God you are the boss”. I am now connected to God and know that He is my only source. I know who I am in Him and who is He is to me. I understand that it is who I am in Him that is going to sustain me when the trials of life hits. I now realize that my only Job is to worship him, to make disciples, and to love everyone with no conditions.
This walk is not always easy but I am determined to finish this race where there are no losers. I am determined to stay focused and true to Him. I am pressing on to heaven my home, I continue to cultivate my heart for God and contend for my faith daily.